discharged

On December 22, 2000, Marie was discharged form the hospital. She had been in for two months and was finally going home, Swollen hand and all. I'm not sure what I expected, but what happened was nothing. Marie came home and sat on the couch. The impending holidays didn't seem to matter to her. Today could have been December 22 or August 17. It didn't matter. They were all the same to her. Her life had changed. Her cognizant reasoning ability was different now. She was no longer going to fit into the life we had. We needed to change. To make a new life together.

I recognized the change in Marie, quicker than others, because I was with her everyday. Going on every appointment, and interacting with her on daily life issues. It has taken much longer for our children to recognize the change. The wanted mom to "get better". I felt the doctors saw this as Marie was "better". The tumor was removed and she was home again. Any residual change, due to the surgery, was just part of life. Although today's quality of life, is not as good as yesterdays quality of life, it's better than it might be tomorrow.

Some people have still not accepted the new Marie. This Marie is a great person. Every bit as good as the last Marie, just different in some ways. Not better, not worse, just different. The neuro physcologist described it as both good and bad for Marie. The good was that Marie knew there were now differences. The bad for her is that she didn't know what the differences were.

Even today her mom will ask me if Marie is doing this or that. When she asks me this, she is trying find out if Marie is doing the things that she used to love. Mom can't seem to accept that those times are over and gone. Marie will never be doing those thing again. Her personality has changed. This Marie has other priorities. I feel bad for my Mother in law some times. If you hold on to the past, you will not enjoy the today's.